Viva La Ruckus

Hi there. Thanks for coming to Viva La Ruckus…home to the stupidest, most long winded, rambling, nonsensical March Madness pool on the face of the Earf. You’re obviously here to have a little fun and join the aforementioned basketball pool, but before you get there I’m going to need you to peruse the following “disclaimer of sorts” to assure that you are not being forced by powers beyond your control or an Act of God to enter the site.

“I, (state your name), have chosen by my own free will to enter the website known as Viva La Ruckus.  I understand that Viva La Ruckus is fraught (yes, fraught) with stupidity and vulgarity but that 93% of said stupidity and vulgarity is to be taken as sarcasm and in a tongue-in-cheek fashion. I also understand that if JD says he’s going come to my living room and gut me if I don’t follow the rules correctly, he’s not REALLY going to come to my living room and gut me since I know, at his core, he’s just a husky Midwestern kid with an affinity for gin, March Madness, cheeseburgers, Pearl Jam, Marisa Miller, and Wrigley Field (in no particular order) and does not mean any offense with his inane ramblings.

I also understand that JD’s intent is NOT to see if he can set a record for the most times using the word fuck (which was 34 times last year, per his friend Martina J’s count) or that he might have a overactive celebrity crush on the aforementioned Marisa Miller, but that’s just the way things go when he’s trying to bang out the Ruckus five days before selection Sunday while on a three-hour flight  to meet someone  who may or may not put the “ouche” in “douche”. But in reality, I understand more often than not that the filthy makes it better. He’s not sure how the filthy makes it better…it just does. Kinda like bacon.

I understand that Viva La Ruckus may or may not cause dizziness, loss of intelligence, anger and/or rage, laughter, nausea, swelling, eye rolling, the urge to hit the back button on your internet browser, discharge, lust, gluttony and the desire for a fish taco.

If I have the slightest inkling that the information contained within Viva La Ruckus might offend me, that if it ain’t my type of hype, I agree to chalk up the minute and a half it just took me to read the above paragraphs as a learning experience and will kindly leave.

Should I choose to enter, I agree 934% that I will not take offense toward JD or anyone affiliated with Viva La Ruckus, nor will I take any sort of legal, physical, negative or mental action against JD or anyone affiliated with Viva La Ruckus.

That being said…either scram or giddy up.

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